Thursday, March 25, 2004

Anger Level - Ha ha ha ha ha, oh sorry, DEFCON 4

I see even the... um... most flamboyant of us angry at times. So angry, we could just slap someone? Slap? Richard, what the hell is that? If someone makes fun of my livelihood, since I am a MAN, I do not slap them. I punch them in the stomach, then I knee them in the jaw, and finally land a right cross to the nose. Then again, my livelihood is not prancing around like a nancy-boy getting fat housewives to dance along with shitty music. Now that I think about it, the guy in question should have punched Richard Simmons! I would punch him, however, with all that grease on his body, my blows might just slide off. I could whip out a baseball bat, though...

Wednesday, March 24, 2004

Anger Level - DEFCON 5 (but it hurts SO bad...)

Another day, another case of Passion-related violence. Just a note: the parents of these two corn-fed winners should watch their backs. Hell, I would be scared if she came after me, with her boring look, stringy hair, and tiny mouth.

On to the real business of the Nation, shall we? Indeed. After a heart-felt conversation with MB2, I have decided to post the following picture. Now, granted, this likely has nothing to do with anger. But it has a lot to do with pain, and pain is a close second to violence and anger, is it not? Don't answer that!!!

So I present, thanks to Rotten.com (as you can see from the credit at the bottom of the picture), damn near the worst thing I have EVER seen in my many years in the War Room.

Last warning.

Click for a bigger picture!

I would comment on the actual pathology of such a wound, and the various problems in removing such a piece of timber from one's... area... but I think I will just put my fancy degree away and bask in the horrible glory. Then I think, in relation to another MB2 conversation, that the classy Mr. Yassin really missed out by getting shot up. He was a shell of a person anyway... he probably doesn't even realize that he is dead yet, given his place in hell is full of his followers, and we all know Hell looks a lot like a Gaza slum. Just think if Israel could have put Yassin through the pain in the "woody" picture. Wowzers.

And it comes full circle... violence, to pain, to anger in one post. So endeth the lesson. Go in peace.


Tuesday, March 23, 2004

Anger Level - eh, DEFCON 4 or 2, as the post progresses

So, the September 11th Commission is having some more "interesting" testimony today. I would like to be the first to announce (or not first, I don't really care, I am lazy and do not read much nowadays other than files, articles about law creation in capitalist/socalist/theocratic societies, and Dune Messiah) that:

I don't give a shit.

Yeah, that's right. I could not care less about this stupid panel. Yes, it is needed. Yes, I support the idea of it. Yes, I think that, in theory, it could be wonderfully helpful, if only to shed light on some issues. However, I think it pretty much crap as is. Everyone is going to defend themselves, regardless of whether they are defensible or not. The people in the system will not blame their bosses, and the people outside the system will blame everyone. To me, I already have a decent idea that there is some truth to all the perspectives... well, maybe not ALL of them. But I digress... I still do not care. There is one exception: unless someone drops a bomb over on the Hill. No, not a Puerto Rican extremist group type bomb in the Capitol, but a bombshell of information. I look at the speakers, and I find it disturbing that, as a non-political science type, I can reasonsablly predict what they will say before they testify. Is that wrong? Isn't this about discovering knowledge, not the same old information being thrust upon us? Eh, what do I know, I find things like this entertaining... (entering DEFCON 2):

Look at that brain pan detached! Oh yeah!

(Thanks to AllahPundit and Getty for the picture... blessed be!)


Wednesday, March 17, 2004

Anger Level - DEFCON 4

Passion related violence!

We all knew it would happen. It was only logical. Now, do not believe the report that he did not see the movie. Of course he did! How else could someone act so irrationally! Hell, I am surprised that he did not seek to exterminate the International Jew, but I figure that he would have done something after nailing his other hand to the wood beam.

The highlights-

He attached a note saying "suicide" to the wood and then proceeded to nail one of his hands to the makeshift cross

Hardly as dramatic as 'INRI,' I must admit. Actually, that's pretty weak. Take the damn nail out, write a better note, and try again!

"When he realized that he was unable to nail his other hand to the board, he called 911"

He would have been able to if he WANTED it enough. Jesus didn't cut corners, and you shouldn't either. Find some place to put the nail so that you can just impale your hand, or get a fellow Rhodes candidate to help out. No pain, no gain. Eyes on the prize. All that crap.

But think of it, now this 23-year old has the stigmata. Given the rate at which the Catholic Church proclaims saints, I am sure this guy could get in (provided that entire self-hate, suicide evidence is thrown out).

And just for fun, AFGHAN DONKEY SEX! I don't plan on commenting, it is TOO good.

Tuesday, March 16, 2004

I still promised I wouldn't cry

I feel like such a follower recently. Due to the fact that my current occupation takes away much of my mornings, I have to play blog catch up. Normally, I just ignore trends and focus on violence. Today, however, I get BOTH! Yeah, it's super!

Today marks the one-year anniversary of Rachel Corrie's death. Anyone coming to this site knows who she was and what a classy lady she was. *cough* Did I say classy? I think I meant to say "stupid." Lesson 1 -- the human body CANNOT win against a bulldozer. Congrats, Ms. Corrie, for proving an axiom of life. If I were really drunk, maybe I could do the same. At least when I shoot the missles at the Soviet Union, I do it out of mutually assured destruction!

So what, some twat is dead. Yes, I am aware I could have stated that in a more refined way indicitive of my educational background. Screw it, I am about anger... just not burning anti-Jew anger, like Ms. Corrie. But I am delaying my point. And here it is... look at the hate going through her...

rachel corrie

You can just see her wanting to scream, "YOU JEW!" Oh, I am so hot now. However, this makes me EVEN HOTTER!

rachel corrie

Yeah, baby, YEAH! Now THAT'S ENTERTAINMENT! Using my educational insights, I would say she got her ribcage crushed (based on the debris on her shirt and the liquid blood coming from the nose).

In conclusion, friends don't let friends lay down in front of bulldozers like half-witted nimrods. Remember, kids: Metal beats protoplasm everytime.

Monday, March 15, 2004

I promised myself that I wouldn't cry

Now, as my last post indicated, I avoided mentioning the Spain incident. Granted, I should probably avoid the entire issues given my last joke I made about it, but reading around the blog world and talking to a few associates both in and out of the War Room, I do have to say my piece. I may not break new ground, but at least I will be on the record.

Spain can vote for whoever the hell they like. That's democracy, for good or for bad. And they may think that getting uninvolved in the world is the answer. That is their right. In fact, voting for losers and being a hermit are two things I will ALWAYS support. That is, unless it is the stupidest course of action possible. In this case, Spain has screwed the pooch.

Do you think that the "we do not negotiate with terrorists" jargon was created in Hollywood? No, it was formulated because it often is the best policy. Those that fight to kill people who are uninvolved with a conflict will only understand violence. Now, I am sure there are people (some of my non-War Room friends in particular) that will mention that the United States does the same thing all over the world blah blah blah. Without going into the specifics, I will actually yield that point. Yeah, crazy, but I will. You know why? Because it changes nothing.

Follow along -- if the US/Spain/whoever is actually a big bad guy bully, and the horrible yet somewhat justified terrorists strike, then what should the response be? To stop bullying? Of course not, because then the terrorists will then be the bully. The terrorists will not be happy with just being left alone. Last time I checked, the goal of ultra-fundamentalist Sunnism is to re-establish the khalifate (a political goal with the ideal of being a global power) and ultra-fundamentalist Shi'ism is to prepare the world for the madhi. Either way, it looks pretty bad for us if they win. They don't want peace, they want to be the ones in control. It reeks of inferiority complex.

Alright, so let's see what happens if the US/Spain/whoever is actually justified in some remote way for the actions against terrorism that are taken. How does my above situation change? The answer is that it doesn't. Why? Because the terrorists remain constant. Who the hell cares about the motives of the United States? We could spend years just looking at what multitude of reasons the US has in this situation. Sure, I bet some of them are driven by greed and oil and all that sort of crap. Yet, clearly not all of them are. In fact, there is one big one -- self-preservation. No matter why the US has acted through history, do not forget that Osama and Company want us DEAD. They want our families dead, our pets dead, and our houses burnt to the ground. How does one reply to such mindless hate? Strength, that's now.

The resources of a nation will always be paramount to those of terrorists, all things considered. What can al-Qaeda do to us? Yeah, they can kill a few of us and knock down our buildings here and there and blow up a few trains. Certainly not pleasant, but not a deathblow. What can a nation do to terrorists? If dedicated, the state can wipe them out over time -- the terrorists can be shown that their brainless exercise will only serve to kill their cause once they are all dead. Terrorists can start a war, but nations can finsh it.

That brings us back to Spain. Through this election, and this fancy-lad who will assume power, the Spainish people will essentially sign a non-aggression pact with terror. I think I remember something comparable in history. Like Hitler, this will give al-Qaeda time to attack others and not worry about Spain, someone they consider as equal of an enemy and always will. (For extra fun, note the date of the German-Soviet pact and compare with the timing for Polish/Western European invasion.)

Welcome to a new day, friends. Whether the Spanish llike it or not, we are at war. Whether America likes it or not, we are at war. The die have been cast, and we have to play for keeps. We don't have to win every step of the way, but we sure as hell shouldn't give the enemy an easy victory. No matter what we do, they will keep coming at us for the foreseeable future. We are stronger, we have that advantage. The sooner the enemy appreciates that sole fact, the quicker it will be over.

Extra respect to My Pet Jawa and Mud, Blood, and Beer in this line. Damn it, we should all be pissed off, not just for what happened, but for what will come.
Anger Level - DEFCON 3

Wow, I disappear for a weekend, and people actually show up. It begs the question, "If a tree falls in the woods, and then springs back upright as a joke, do the squirrels freak the fuck out?" Of course, we all know the answer is "seven."

Anyhow, many thanks to the blog-rollingness of The Grand Vizier. In fact, that magnificent bastard stole my thunder on the Spanish election thing I was going to write. Bah, 200 dead and a transformation of a government to a bunch of limp-wristed nancy-boys isn't violent enough anyway. Yeah, that's the ticket.

Besides, so much wonderful anger is being shown stateside and elsewhere. Sure, everyone has heard of The #1 Dad of lovely Fresno, but no one has made much of a comment about why the bodies were stacked one on top of the other. Very upsetting, I need more crime scene details! Note to self: get a hairdo like that guy. Hot!

But if you want to see hot, check this piece of tail out. Only 28 years old, a smoker, and she will kill any byproduct of knocking her up. It's like having a female Michael Corleone, or free reign with a wire hanger. Outstanding!

Now, if you pass her up and are foolish enough to procreate, at least know how to keep your damn kids in line. Maybe the dog wouldn't have died if you LOVED it enough, you spoiled brats!

If discipline isn't your thing, surely someone else will be glad to take your rugrats off your hands. The only thing that makes up for only 2% of the kids killing their own parents (hell, I think the percentage is higher in this country!) is that fact that 27% had to drink their own urine. It brings a tear to my eye, yes it does.

Friday, March 12, 2004

Anger Level - DEFCON 1

Wow, I am gone for a bit of time, and look at all the excitement in the world of anger! First, the standard fare. Get it? 'Fare'? Like what you pay on a train? Oh, I even manage to impress myself sometimes. I am actually shocked it had not happened earlier, to be honest. I see trains everywhere, and being a native New Yorker, I appreciate the level of violence that can be accomplished through knifings and shootings. Of course, what I also notice is now many morons leave their bags on the train. I myself, in my less noble times, have thought to rummage through these bags to procure various goods and services. In that context, I would flip the fuck out if I found a bomb with a timer in the bag. I would probably just give the bag to an old lady and be off at the next stop. Out of sight, out of mind!

Speaking of not seeing something coming, we have quite an anger-filled moment here. But he lost so many points with his tearful apology. Come on, we all know he meant to cream that Moore fellow. This should be, lo MUST be, settled in the only true way known -- fistacuffsmanship. Once this Moore chap has his brain pan reattched to his skull, there should be some bare-knuckle, cheap-seat, beer-flowing fighting action. Or, in other words, just another damn hockey game.

But these two stories have NOTHING on the impact of this, the apex of anger in our generation. Self-hatred is the worst kind of all. We must learn to love ourselves, or else we may never have the chance to love others. But hey, I guess fornicators could make me mad too, if I thought about it long and hard.

Friday, March 05, 2004

Anger Level - DEFCON 4

This incident comes from the group of people that want governments to pay them for world peace.

You see, while clearly an isolated incident and by no means a regular pattern of violence, I still gloat like little school girl. I like seeing the uppity get hit with a newspaper after peeing on the rug.

Here lies a toppled god--
His fall was not a small one.
We did but build his pedestal,
A narrow and a tall one.

--Tleilaxu Epigram

On that note, what color scheme goes well with orange, grey, and shit stains on a toliet installed before The Flood? Maybe I can send her a map of Leavenworth while I am at it. Again, not that I really care... but more to the point of this blog, maybe Martha can get some prisoner-on-prisoner violence going?

That would be such a good thing.

Thursday, March 04, 2004

Anger Level - DEFCON 2

This reminds me of a joke I heard once...

Q: What do 30,000 beaten and abused women have in common each year?
A: They don't know how to listen!

My favorite part of the above story was this:

Building manager Dennis Cruz, 43, said he saw the body. "Her face was so pretty, regardless of the blood," he said.

You know, Dennis, that regardless of how much you compliment her now, she STILL won't sleep with you. Geez, some people never learn!

Now, with such a classy offender, one has to wonder why she never said yes in the first place? Oh, love is a tricky beast...

Wednesday, March 03, 2004

Anger Level- DEFCON 3

Looks like those loser Haitans are up to no good (Picture #5 under 'haitan rebel victims').

Am I wrong to not care about them? Am I wrong to wonder why Kerry would send troops to this podunk island? If 4,000 rebels can sack the entire country, let them have it. Last time I checked, it isn't worth it.

Tuesday, March 02, 2004

Just a taste of the Hatred I have in store...

To start off, I will run with this. I used it before on a now defunct posting thing, but I like it. So before things get too serious, I give you one of the most well-thought pieces of American diction in the past 150 years. We may thank Lee Elia, the manager of the 1983 Chicago Cubs. The rant was in April (before Wrigley Field had lights for night baseball) following a home loss to the Dodgers and in front of writers and microphones:

Fuck those fuckin' fans who come out here and say they're Cub fans that are supposed to be behind you, rippin' every fuckin' thing you do. I'll tell you one fuckin' thing, I hope we get fuckin' hotter than shit, just to stuff it up them 3,000 fuckin' people that show up every fuckin' day, because if they're the real Chicago fuckin' fans, they can kiss my fuckin' ass right downtown and PRINT IT.

They're really, really behind you around here...my fuckin' ass. What the fuck am I supposed to do, go out there and let my fuckin' players get destroyed every day and be quiet about it? For the fuckin' nickel-dime people who turn up? The motherfuckers don't even work. That's why they're out at the fuckin' game. They oughta go out and get a fuckin' job and find out what it's like to go out and earn a fuckin' living. Eighty-five percent of the fuckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A fuckin' playground for the cocksuckers. Rip them motherfuckers. Rip them fuckin' cocksuckers like the fuckin' players. We got guys bustin' their fuckin' ass, and them fuckin' people boo. And that's the Cubs? My fuckin' ass. They talk about the great fuckin' support the players get around here. I haven't see it this fuckin' year. Everybody associated with this organization have been winners their whole fuckin' life. Everybody. And the credit is not given in that respect.

Alright, they don't show because we're 5 and 14...and unfortunately, that's the criteria of them dumb fifteen motherfuckin' percent that come out to day baseball. The other eighty-five percent are earning a living. I tell you, it'll take more than a 5 and 12 or 5 and 14 to destroy the makeup of this club. I guarantee you that. There's some fuckin' pros out there that wanna win. But you're stuck in a fuckin' stigma of the fuckin' Dodgers and the Phillies and the Cardinals an all that cheap shit. It's unbelievable. It really is. It's a disheartening fuckin' situation that we're in right now. Anybody who was associated with the Cub organization four or five years ago that came back and sees the multitude of progress that's been made will understand that if they're baseball people, that 5 and 14 doesn't negate all that work. We got 143 fuckin' games left.

What I'm tryin' to say is don't rip them fuckin' guys out there. Rip me. If you wanna rip somebody, rip my fuckin' ass. But don't rip them fuckin' guys 'cause they're givin' everything they can give. And right now they're tryin' to do more than God gave 'em, and that's why we make the simple mistakes. That's exactly why.

Let the record show that the Chicago Cubs would win the NL East the following year (which had been the first time since 1945), though Mr. Elia had been replaced by Jim Frey. So much for that fuckin' fuck.
Statement of Values

The purpose of this blog is to be a love letter to rage, of sorts. I mention "of sorts" because I am sure I will fail. However, I came up with this idea during the physical act of love, so therefore it must be good. There is a lot of anger in this world, so I best jump on the bandwagon while it's still fresh.
Broadcasting live from a secret underground bunker below Timbuktu...

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